Growth Patterns

GROWTH PATTERNS

May Humility Not Be a Painful Journey

“May humility not be a painful journey.”

That sentence came to me during a walking meditation with such clarity that I stopped and listened to it.

I usually frame my intentions around what I want to call in.

More love.

More connection.

More abundance.

More clarity.

This one felt different. Same feeling of divine wisdom “downloading.”

May humility not be a painful journey.

Growth, it’s not the easiest path.

It has a way of bringing us face-to-face with ourselves; openly, with intention, or the pulling, kicking and screaming kind of responsibility without much option.

Lately, I have been placing myself intentionally into what I would call growth patterning—moving beyond some of the deeper layers of self-limitation, self-worth, connection, identity, and belief.

With every new version of ourselves comes a new opportunity to move through the world differently.

I’ll speak through the lens of my 95 year old father-in-law. It’s like the upgrading of a phone.

The new version may look familiar, but its capacity is different. New functions become available. New challenges appear. There are things the old version simply could not do. It may not feel the same.

The human soul is much the same.

The soul wants to be stretched.

However, there is a fine line between stretching ourselves and exhausting ourselves.

There is discipline.

There is effort.

There is practice.

There is responsibility.

Then there is the moment when we have done our work and must allow the work to work on us.

That part can be difficult.

It’s often described as patience.

We often want to keep pushing.

Keep learning.

Keep fixing.

Keep searching.

Keep becoming.

But sometimes there is nothing more to learn in that moment.

There is something to integrate. Allow things to settle into place.

At times (more than not), we are already carrying the information we are desperately looking for. It simply has not moved from information into embodiment.

We know it intellectually.

Now we have to live it.

That is where humility enters.

The Stretch

Growth can feel like being stretched beyond the familiar.

As long as we don’t stretch ourselves into exhaustion or panic, the stretching creates capacity.

We become more adaptable.

More resilient.

More curious.

More capable of meeting life without immediately needing to control the outcome.

When a personality desperately refuses change, humility can become painful. Unbearable at times.

Life has a way of showing us where we have become too full of ourselves - or too full of the story we have created about ourselves and others.

The universe doesn’t necessarily punish us.

It simply reflects.

The reflection can be uncomfortable.

The human soul doesn’t enjoy stagnancy either. It wants movement. It wants direction. It wants expression. Every soul has its own blueprint.

That blueprint is as unique as a fingerprint.

Your path is not supposed to look exactly like mine.

My growth isn’t supposed to look exactly like yours. That’s not the design.

The work is discovering what is uniquely yours—and then having the courage and discipline to walk it.

Humility Is Quiet

Humility is not thinking less of yourself.

It is no longer needing to prove yourself.

Humility doesn’t require us to disappear.

It asks us to become less attached to the identity of “I.”

I am right.

I know.

I deserve.

I need.

I should.

They should.

This should happen now.

Humility creates space for what IS to be.

There’s wisdom beyond our personal agendas and interpretations.

There’s brilliance and sagacity in the knowing. There’s a humbling freedom in not needing to do anything with it.

There is a beautiful teaching in the Tao Te Ching:

“Those who know do not talk. Those who talk do not know.”

I don’t believe this means we should become silent or stop sharing our wisdom. It’s about timing and approach in my opinion. Don’t ‘push or pull’ type of thing, unless asked, or part of the profession or responsibility.

The person who truly knows does not need to constantly announce that they know.

Wisdom becomes quieter.

It becomes embodied.

It becomes something we live rather than something we have to convince others of.

This is often where peace resides.

The Upright Heart

Energetically, I see humility beginning at the heart chakra—Anahata—and extending through the high heart, throat, solar plexus, and root.

The heart is where truth becomes compassion.

The solar plexus?

Yup, this is where our programs of self hang out.

So how can I be myself without needing to make myself more important than someone else?

The throat chakra?

Yup, how can we communicate it?

Can I speak my truth without placing my beliefs onto another?

The root?

Yup, let’s act! But are we safe?

The root chakra gets online when we feel safe and we trust who we are to be shown into the world without recourse.

Can I feel safe enough to release control?

The heart chakra brings them together my friends.

Remain open while standing firmly in who we are. That’s the lane.

This is what I think of as the upright heart.

A heart that is full of space.

A heart that becomes responsive instead of reactive.

A heart that allows self to maintain boundaries.

An upright heart is open and discerning.

Discernment…this quite possibly may be one of the most important spiritual gifts we can possess. We can also strengthen it like a muscle.

An upright heart is strong and compassionate.

Rooted and adaptable.

It knows its truth without needing to attack another person’s truth.

The heart chakra is often associated with love, but I believe its deeper wisdom is connection through truth.

It is where we begin to understand that divine connection doesn’t require us to abandon ourselves.

It asks us to become more authentically ourselves.

The heart holds a kind of divine wisdom that the mind cannot always explain.

It knows when something is aligned.

It knows when something is forced.

It knows the difference between control and surrender.

It knows when we are speaking from love and when we are speaking from protection.

It also knows when we have done enough.

When the Ego Takes Over

Pain often enters when we want, desire, or control too much.

We see the world through the lens in which we want to see it.

We want things on our timeline.

We want people to respond the way we believe they should.

We want circumstances to change when we are ready for them to change.

When they don’t, the ego has plenty of material to work with.

The doubter.

The self-saboteur.

The victim.

The blamer.

The hater.

The one who says:

“See? I knew this wouldn’t work.” The prover.

These inner voices (and personalities) aren’t enemies.

They are often protective patterns.

The ego is deeply connected to our ideas of safety and identity. It wants a known path forward.

When something threatens that path, it reacts.

And the universe gives us the perfect mirror.

We meet our own energy coming back toward us.

Not as punishment, but information...information that goes missed in stubbornness, ignorance, and fear.

Life’s A boomerang.

What are we actually putting into the field?

What are we reinforcing?

What are we calling in?

What are we becoming?

Worthiness and Receiving

When we call something into our lives that we genuinely desire—for ourselves or for another—we also have to become capable of receiving it.

That involves worthiness.

Let’s not trick ourselves either here. We can sometimes feel the superficial kind of worthiness, “I deserve this because (insert whatever it is that supports our story here).”

It’s a much deeper sense of worthiness.

The kind where willingness is at the forefront to become the person who can hold whatever it is we are invitating in.

If I am calling in peace, can I practice peace?

If I am calling in love, can I practice love?

If I am calling in connection, can I become safe enough to connect?

If I am calling in abundance, can I receive without immediately fearing that it will disappear?

This is where growth patterning becomes real.

We aren’t simply asking the universe for something different.

We are participating in becoming different.

Gratitude Changes the Pattern

There is another energetic pattern that feels especially important here:

Gratitude.

Gratitude shifts our relationship with what already exists.

Appreciation softens resistance.

Sincerity aligns our inner intention with our outer action.

Humility allows us to recognize that we are participating in something much larger than ourselves.

When we come from gratitude, appreciation, sincerity, and humility, we don’t have to force the door open.

We become available to what is already trying to meet us.

Humility becomes the key.

So let’s open some doors!

The Spiral

It may not be what you think

Growth is rarely a straight line.

We spiral. Then we upspiral.

We revisit old patterns from a new level of awareness.

Something that once broke us may now simply teach us.

Something that once triggered us may now reveal an opportunity.

Something we thought we had healed may return—not in failure, but because we are now capable of meeting it differently.

That is growth. That is the design.

New forms.

New consciousness.

New choices.

New embodiment.

Beneath all of it is the same foundational practice: Humility.

To remain curious.

To remain teachable.

To remain willing.

To know who we are without becoming imprisoned by who we think we are.

I used to trip on this a lot. The goal isn’t to become some perfected version of ourselves and remain consistently in that energy. That’s not how growth works.

When we can become more available to the truth of who we already are, we can show up within that energy, no matter what it is.

Humility connects me to this:

Returning to our original state.

Less noise.

Less proving.

Less defending.

Less grasping.

More presence.

More trust.

More love.

More truth.

More connection.

That’s why I love my particular practice. When we can do that, growth doesn’t hurt so much. I don’t stay in that patterning too long. I’m a big fan of self-compassion and grace.

So, humility doesn’t have to arrive through a painful lesson. We don’t have to suffer.

The keys: Listen. Notice. Integrate. And Allow.

May humility not be a painful journey.

May it be the quiet doorway through which we remember who we already are.

The Nature Within

Find Your Light. Spread it out into the world.